The jumping Muñe :)
Once upon a time a beautiful
girl, a little princess that was called Cinderella, but everybody told her
"Muñe" because she got so angry when someone said Cinderella, never
liked, and nobody knew why. She was really problematic and embittered, but
inside she was dreamy. Muñe practiced high jump, that was her passion, and she
didn't like be a princess, she just really wish be a normal person, a sportswoman,
but with the power that fly and thus, live in the sky, sleep in the clouds and
jump and jump everywhere.
One day she was
jumping in the garden, and suddenly fell, and that was so serious, although the
doctors of the palace had to amputate her leg. Obviously that was so dramatic
and sad for her and her family. But muñe, she just wanted to die, now, what
would do without one leg? Her life and happiness was jump, she was inexplicably
shattered and frustrate.
Then, she decided
escape of the palace and go far, and well, she did it and went to Scotland,
there, she knew a doctor and he, Andy, put her a prosthesis, with that, she
could continue jumping, and of course muñe returned to be happy but she wanted
more, she wanted to fly, so that she remembered that she didn't live in the
palace, but she has her fairy godmother yet, muñe called her and said: if i
only could live in the sky. And just saying that, her wish was granted.
As you can imagine,
muñe went immediately to sky, she led her clothes, and the most important, her
jumpers shoes. Now, she lived alone, but happier that anyone. She jumped from
the clouds, as high as possible, slept in the clouds or on the top of the
skyscrapers, and from that day was always happy and doing what she liked,
living at the sky and jumping wherever, however and whenever.
Awnnn the story is very beautiful and the princess "Muñe" hahahaha. *o*
ReplyDeleteOne day I will ask you about why the names "Muñe" and "Lune"... I promise.
ReplyDeleteMistakes:
- "everybody told her "Muñe"
- "she didn't like be a princess"
- "she just really wish be a normal person"
- "the power that fly"
- "But muñe"
- "she decided escape of"
- "of course muñe"
- " muñe went "
- "happier that anyone"
Kathleen, what you have to do now is to correct the mistakes, but you DON'T have to re-post the story, you can reply to this comment correcting the mistakes.
I have to say that your story was creative and I liked the fact that you included some topics and vocabulary from the classes, that's something great and obviously Muñe is an excellent example of achieving goals.
1. Character = You described a lot of her characteristics.
2. Challenge = You focused a lot on this element, well done!
3. Motivation = OK
4. Setting = You didn't describe a lot the setting.
5. Obstacles = Great!
6. Climax = You combined many good and bad situations together so it is difficult to recognize the climax in the story.
7. Ending = OK
The grammar structure of your sentences is great. Thanks for using vocabulary from the classes.
PS: don't forget to correct the mistakes replying to this comment. :)
Thanks teacher.
ReplyDeleteEverybody named her "Muñe".
She didn't like to be a princess.
She just really wanted to be a normal person.
The power to fly.
Muñe just wanted.
She decided to escape of.
Happier than anyone.
But Muñe.
Of course Muñe.
With love: Kathleen. Haha <3